Dreamtree

Sit here with me under the Arbor Vitae, and let us consider the world.

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Location: Desert Southwest, United States

I have measured out my life with coffee spoons. ~T.S. Eliot

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Cosa Nostra

Here's a thing. My First Husband has lost his business, and so I can fairly expect my fortunes to change. It seems exciting, like the clean scent of winter in the air. He informed me that he would begin divorcing me right away, so I shouldn't worry. I don't follow the logic here, but I told him there is no particular rush.
Yay! I returned paragraph!
Anyway, there is no discernible difference in the day-to-day. The bills are paid, the same amounts are deposited in my bank account, noone can tell that my measly $600.00 a month is our family's only income. Still, I can feel the desperation and fear emmanating from his wretched apartment.
He won't discuss it, and resents any of my attempts to bring it up. The question is, what is my role here exactly? Should I quit my job and go back to full-time, top wages? Or wait until I'm asked? I have the feeling now would be the time to move to Florida, as in his secret heart of hearts he is wishing we would all just vanish off the face of the Earth, and leaving him free of any and all responsibility other than wallowing in self-pity. On the way home from work today, I heard several ads for The Sopranos on the radio. Big Tony kept insisting, "Once you're part of this family, there's no getting out." I feel like that pretty much sums up my marriage vows. So, I'll hang for a while. And twist.

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